We are getting closer and closer to Christmas time, a time for baking cookies, family gatherings and twinkly lights, and possibly a time where you feel like you’re endlessly rushing around and maybe even like you’re racing against the clock. I know I’ve been there. As believers, I believe that we genuinely want to focus our hearts, minds, and homes on Christ, especially in this season of Christmas. But if we’re being honest, it can be really easy to fall into the traps of commercialization and obligatory busyness as December draws closer and closer. The purpose of today’s episode is to help you embrace Advent and to help you slow down the pace this Christmas season. It’s to help you focus on what Christmas is truly all about, which is easier said than done, I know.
Today’s guest, Jen Ludwig, is joining me with tips about how you can effectively prepare your heart and your home for Christmas this season. Jen is a Jesus follower, a writer and a worship leader. She lives in California with her husband John, where they’re almost empty nesters with their oldest at college and their youngest finishing high school this year. Jen’s devotional Embracing Advent, which we’ll be talking about today, offers daily encouragement to focus on the gifts of hope, peace, joy, and love at Christmas time.
What is Advent?
Let’s start by talking about what Advent actually is. For many people, the first thing that comes to mind is a countdown. However, in the tradition of church history, Advent is not a 25 day countdown, it’s actually the four weeks that lead up to Christmas. It begins the fourth Sunday before Christmas, no matter where that lands.
Advent actually means coming. And it is a time when we are looking forward to Christ coming into the world as a baby as He did 2000 years ago. It’s a time to look forward to when He will one day come again, and it’s also a time when we can look for the ways that He is coming into our lives and our hearts today.
More specifically, the four Sundays during Advent generally focus on four themes – hope, peace, joy, and love. The traditional Advent framework is a really wonderful way to prepare for Christmas. And if you’re not already celebrating this, I’d really encourage you to do so because it’s a time for pause and reflection. It’s special as a believer and I think it’s a great way to draw our hearts and our minds closer to Christ and to think on those things. The Christmas season can be such a busy rushed time, where it’s all about checking off the boxes, right? But Advent brings us back to why we’re doing all of the celebrating, the parties and cookie baking and family time, which can be almost a distraction sometimes.
I also find that at Christmas time, especially as women, we build up all these expectations in our mind, and we’re imagining this perfect Christmas morning with our kids and our spouse. And it’s like there’s so much anticipation and expectation and then it comes and goes, and we feel disappointed. And I think that a lot of that is because we don’t have our hearts and minds focused on the right things. But if we’re rooted and focused on those four things, then it’s not just about that one single day, but your heart and mind are rooted in these four beautiful gifts in Christ. I feel like it just it sets you up for more peace and joy throughout the entire year.
Jen was first introduced to an Advent devotional during church services as a kid. Flash forward a decade, she was with her own family with young children and started to realize just how busy the season is. And while we are all well-meaning and well-intentioned, it’s hard not to get caught up in or distracted by the stuff we’re doing and lose a little bit of focus on why we’re doing it. But if we focus on the traditional Advent, it encourages us to live intentionally in those four weeks, and it provides an opportunity to reflect on what we’re preparing for.
Focus on What Matters
So how can we prepare our hearts and keep our focus on what really matters most during the Advent season? Jen shares the story of Mary and Martha out of Luke 10… Jesus came to a village, and a woman called Martha welcomed Him to her house. She had a sister by the name of Mary, who settled down at the Lord’s feet, and was listening to what He said. But Martha was very worried about Laborat preparations. And she burst in saying, “Lord, don’t you mind that my sister has left me to do everything by myself, tell her to get up and help me.”
But the Lord answered her, “Martha, my dear, you are worried and bothered about providing so many things. Only a few things are really needed. Perhaps only one, Mary has chosen the best part, and you must not tear it away from her.”
So, Jesus comes to the sister’s house, and they have an amazing opportunity to just spend time with Him. But Martha immediately gets so caught up in the preparations, that essentially, she misses out. I think that she is so well-intentioned, that she is like, Jesus is in my home! I want to make this special, I want to provide for Him. But in the midst of, that she misses the point. And I think that that can happen for us, too as we get so excited about Christmas that we start to make elaborate preparations…the things that we’re going to do with our children, the things that we’re going to do with our families, the things that we’re going to do at our church, even good things like serving can then become our focus, instead of the why; it’s just special because Jesus is there. So during the Advent season, be like Mary. Just sit at Jesus’s feet and make that your number one priority.
Intentional Time with Jesus
So what does that look like and how do we do that practically? For me, I think it’s really important that we find a comfy spot that we can come to every day to meet with Jesus. So my encouragement for us all as we’re going into the Advent season is to be thinking about when, and where and how we’re going to find that time with Jesus.
The when is important because habits are a real thing, right? When you do things repeatedly, they become easier to do. So I really strongly suggest that people find a time that’s consistent each day, whether it’s five minutes, 45 minutes, wherever you’re at, to meet with Jesus and to sit at His feet. The where is equally important because our bodies have mental connections to places. Also, you need to decide in advance how you’re going to spend your time. There’s this amazing trickle effect that happens when we form good habits in our lives. If we are intentional in making habits, our kids see those new habits form and it can just create this beautiful legacy.
So, as you are preparing for the upcoming holidays, don’t get so caught up in the elaborate preparations that you are no longer taking the time to also sit at Jesus’s feet. The preparations do need to be done, and we’re called to work and we’re called to take care of things and be good stewards and be hospitable – so some of that is needed but there’s a time and place for that. There’s a time and place for intentional focus.
Declutter Your Calendar
In the same way that we often need to declutter our stuff, we also need to declutter our calendar, and have a realistic look at our time. One of the things that we can do is a brain dump. Start by setting aside 15 minutes and grab a piece of paper. Then, write down every single thing that you would like to do this Christmas. Once you have that paper filled up, circle the three things that are the most important to you and your family. Then, take a look at the paper again, and cross out three things that you’re definitely letting go of this year.
Some of this will come easily but some if it can be hard because we are also considering not just the things we want to do, but also what things benefit our family. What are the things that are really important to our kids to our spouses? What are the things that are going to draw us closer to Christ that we really need to hold on to?
I think you’ll be interested to see just how many things you write down just because you’ve always done them, it’s tradition. But sometimes we can lose sight of the seasons changing and that it’s time for new traditions, to meet our kids where they are, to meet our family where it is. So take a few minutes and take that to God and be like, what do we need to do this year? Who are the neighbors you want me to read this year? How is it that you want me to serve at my church this year, not just because this is what we’ve always done.
So start there and then you want to pull out the calendar. The three things you said yes to, put them on the calendar. If baking cookies with your kids is important to you, pick the date, put it on the calendar. If you want to do a service project together as a family, put it on the calendar. If you want to spend Christmas Eve, or Christmas morning with just your immediate family, set that boundary and communicate that with your extended family. There’s going to be lots of stuff that can come up during the holidays, so you want to make sure those most important things are already scheduled. And by the way, when we talked about quiet time, if that’s not a habit, I would say put that on the calendar too.
Once you’ve decided what you’re saying yes to, you can start to say no to some of the things you’ve done before. No, I’m not going to do the advent calendar with all the verses in it. No, we’re not going to build the gingerbread house this year. Know in advance that you’re going to say no to the holiday cookie exchange or to the ugly sweater party at the office. If we think about those things in advance and no what our no’s are, it makes it so much easier.
And with that, I would say leave margin and don’t fill it up in case something unexpected comes up because it’s important to keep in mind that everything you say yes to actually means you’re saying no to something else, because there’s only so much time. We just cannot do it all.
Another thing to keep in mind when you’re choosing is to make sure that you’re choosing things that are in alignment with your values. And I think giving yourself the permission and grace to focus in on those three and to cross off three, that’s huge.
Embracing Advent
Let’s talk about Jen’s beautiful devotional, Embracing Advent: Rediscovering Christmas in the Chaos. It’s so beautiful and I love the journey that it walks the reader through. So just to step back a little bit again, Advent starts December 3 this year. And the focus traditionally is on those four weeks and those four themes of hope, peace, joy and love. The goal is that this devotional is a companion for women through that time and that it gives them a little bit of structure. There is a verse each day and one point or truth to walk away with, and one takeaway to bring into your day that can help you keep the focus on those things during the Advent season. It is divided up into four chunks, one for each week. Whether you’re a planner, or somebody who needs a plan, this devotional can help you on that journey.
It was so great to have Jen on the show today. We are both praying that you have a lovely and a very joy-filled Christmas season.
Connect with Jen!
- Connect on Facebook
- Hang out on Instagram at EmbracingAdvent & JenLudwigWrites
- Visit her website
